What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize