I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Randomize
