Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
where does the pee come out of this thing
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize