We should be called the Road Head Warriors
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
