hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize