Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
