Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize