he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
