she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
