i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
