The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
