you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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