So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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