Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
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