I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Randomize
