No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
