Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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