those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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