At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
