your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
