So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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