he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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