Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
and i looked up. we had an audience...
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize