We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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