You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
