Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
