More tranny stories later!
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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