I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
