Your dad touched me again.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
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