Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
