im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
