Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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