the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
