I just made out with a guy for $7.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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