she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
