If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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