The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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