Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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