I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
