May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
