then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
