Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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