So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
