Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
