if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
