you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize