loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
