you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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