Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize
