I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
