you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
