I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
